Fate Has Led Me Here: Shaken and Bruised, but Stronger

Photo by Bernard Hermant on Unsplash
Photo by Bernard Hermant on Unsplash

‘You are exactly where you are supposed to be.’
This is a line from one of the meditations I listen to via the Insight Timer app. Hearing this calms me down every time.
My situation is all right, I am okay, there is no need to change. My ever-worrying mind calms down when I take in this message.
Yes, I believe in fate. I think things happen to us so we can learn and grow from them, even the horrible stuff. I know it’s not an easy message., and I wouldn’t have believed you in my darkest hours. But right now, I’m convinced I’m as strong as I am because of everything I went through.

My Mother’s Lessons

My mother was an intelligent woman with a sharp mind. She was not one to blindly follow instructions or believe everything on the news. I was thinking about this the other day when I was in discussion with my husband. He is critical of everything, most of all about politics and the government. I’m quite naive, and for the longest time, I was convinced the government had the people’s best intentions at heart. I’m not so sure now.
While considering my stance, and wondering where I would have been without my husband, my mother’s opinions came back to me. She had a broad medical knowledge. I’m convinced she would have had her own mind about the Covid-19 situation and how things are handled by the people in charge. I probably would have scoffed at her, but she did instil the need in me to think for myself and never blindly follow others. This was a valuable lesson I have learned.

Don’t Trust People

Because of my life, I know how untrustworthy and mean people can be. I’ve been hurt numerous times, both by friends and by other people around me. My time working in retail taught me many people are selfish and often have bad intentions. The downside is that I have trouble trusting people. Are you holding the door open for me as a purely friendly gesture, or are you out to rob me?
The upside is that I’m somewhat less prone to be scammed or robbed. No, not invincible, but at least I’m aware of the possibility. It’s my first instinct to scan someone’s kind gesture for possible harm and foul play.

Good Friends

So is it all bad? No, not really. I’m just very cautious who I let into my life. I’m in the process of making new friends and exposing myself to the world. I don’t rush things, but take little steps in every way. The upside is that the friends I’m making are good people. I’m starting to trust them. In many ways, they’re like me. We hold the same political views. They don’t take unnecessary risks. We respect each other for the way we are, differences and quirks and all.

Battered, Bruised, and Contused

I believe fate has led me here for a reason. I may be battered, bruised and contused, but I’m here. I’m stronger for it. My mother has brought me up to be an intelligent woman who makes her own decisions. I don’t follow others blindly. I’m wary of strangers, especially strangers who pretend to offer you the world. I don’t like people who pretend.
Friendships build over time. They don’t pop up instantly. If you have shown your trustworthiness, I may allow you inside my heart. But don’t think about abusing my trust, because that door will get shut again, without a second thought. This is where fate has brought me so far. And it’s right where I need to be.


Personal Growth Matters

13 Comments

  1. I agree we all learn lessons throughout our lives to make us the people we are today, and we all continue to learn throughout our lives. I trust easily, but sadly have learned that I should more mistrusting than I have been. And like your mom, mine has taught me to think for myself, although it’s still part of my nature to live with my head in the clouds 😉
    ~ Marie

    1. Yeah, and the worst part is, when she was still alive, I thought it was kinda silly she was that way. Why not just trust the government? Alas, by now I know better 😕

      Lizblackx
  2. Great post Liz! To make your own mind up and not follow blindly will become more important in the coming months i think…

    “I was convinced the government had the people’s best intentions at heart. I’m not so sure now.”

    I wrote a post called “Deep Thinking” the other day – about Bob the perve – but if u read between the lines Bob was a symbol of many things – why do people trust “Bob” – and I was also referring to what u have said in your quote.

    Experience makes us stronger – for sure.
    May xx

    1. Thanks May. I think I read your post, but I’ll check it again with this knowledge in mind 😊

      Indeed, I’m afraid we’re gonna need our ‘thinking-for-ourselves-skill’ plenty in the year to come.

      Lizblackx
  3. In my younger days, when my father was still alive, #Mothership used to ask the same question in many different ways. Now I’m older I understand why she did that. Trust issues. Once we have been treated badly it definitely makes us very wary.
    As others have said before me, you’re wise to keep an open mind and wait until you grant access to your kind heart

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