I Started a Sex Blog – Now What?

One Year Rookie

Illustration to the text 'I Started a Sex Blog - Now What?' by Liz BlackX
Photo by Emma Matthews Digital Co
Blank pages can look daunting to any writer, so also to bloggers
Photo byΒ Emma Matthews Digital Co

My sex blog is weeks away from reaching its one year anniversary, so who am I to give advice on this subject?
Well, I learned a lot this past year. I honestly never thought I’d make it past three or four months. I’m excellent in starting new projects, but not so good at seeing them through. So how did I manage to keep my blog up and running? Was it always easy and fun? What are my plans for the future?

A Blog in 2019

When I first started my blog, I was clueless. I knew very little about blogging. I’d had a personal blog in 2005, but that was little more than a public journal. I thought blogging was dead by now. I mean, who starts a blog in 2019 in the world of Instagram and YouTube? Well, I did, and it worked out fine for me.
My first posts were the most difficult ones to write. I took some general BDSM themes to write about, and things about my writing, but I struggled. I looked at how other people solved this issue, and that’s how I found memes to write about.

Memes

I love the prompts, as they can give you a structure to write about. When linking a post to the meme, you are almost assured of an audience who will read your work. I post most frequently to the Food for Thought meme and even submitted some suggestions for subjects too. I also write for Sex Bloggers for Mental Health, Wicked Wednesday and Tell Me About. On Monday, I scroll through the different memes and look at possible subjects I want to write about. I need to have some flicker of inspiration at a prompt for me to elect it, else I’ll just skip it. This can mean I don’t join a meme in months until I do have an idea for an interesting blog post with a prompt. This is what works best for me.

Schedule

In the beginning, I was very strict about posting twice a week, usually at the beginning of the week and at the end. I adhered to this schedule to give structure to myself, but also because I hate blogs which will have five posts in two days, and then nothing for weeks. I’ve kept this up for the longest time, and I still sort of do it to this day.
I’ve let go of the ‘two blog posts a week’ schedule, but I’ve broadened it to ‘two posts a week,’ roughly. For me, this means I can also post a review or a fictional piece and still satisfy this rule.

My advice would be to keep to some sort of schedule, one that you think you can maintain for more extended periods. And yes, I’m envious of my blogging colleagues who can write in-depth posts almost every day, but I also know that that’s not me. It would make me needlessly stressed out and overburdened, so I keep to my plan.

Easy?

Do I ever feel empty, like I’ve written everything I want to write about my sex life and mental health? Yes, often enough. These past three months, my blogging is not as natural and easy as it was in the beginning. I often feel like I’m repeating myself and don’t feel original and inspired. So did I quit? Nope.
I still write blog posts, even though I feel like they’re mediocre and not really ‘wow.’ I hope one day, my inspired posts will return, but that day will not come if I stop writing now.

Different Ventures

What I have done, and this is quite a conscious choice, is diversify my writing. Next to writing blog posts, I also write reviews of sex toys and erotic fiction. This is precisely the distraction my head needs to keep it preoccupied and busy.
I’ve been approached by sex toy companies to write for them, and so I’ve written for Paloqueth, Tantaly and BestVibe. Writing a review is an entirely different ball game from a personal blog post, so it’s a perfect substitute.

Something else that I’ve focused on these past weeks is publishing sexy short stories on my website. I wrote the ‘Mandy Gets Fixed’ story as a silly in-between job, and I never meant for it to become this big. But I received a lot of attention for it, so I expanded the story, and I keep adding to it every week. Next to the Masturbation Monday hits, it gives me, I also receive hits on that story via Google. My visitor count nearly doubled these past few weeks. So apparently I’m now a bimbofication-serial writer. It’s fine with me.

Take Your Chances

What I mean with this example is what everyone is always saying about hits and virals: you never know what the public will like.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not the next E.L.James with this one story. We’re talking dozens of hits, not hundreds or thousands. But I do know that if I hadn’t started my blog, I never would have found this public. So you never know what will work for you.
Try what works for you. Write what inspires you. And if you’re tired of writing, try taking pictures. I know my fellow sex bloggers are having a lot of fun and success with doing photographs.

Diversify and take what opportunities arise. I accepted the offers I got from sex toy companies. That was scary, yes, because I had to give out my address and all, but it did give me new content and visitors to my website.
When I saw that people liked my bimbofication story, I chose to add to it, and I made myself publish a new part every week. It’s extraordinary for me to be this punctual in writing fiction, but I did it.
So yes, it comes down to this: sit down, write and publish. Don’t beat yourself down for missing a day, a week or even a month, but come back to it and keep making content. You never know where it may lead you.


Some of the above links are affiliate links. When you click on them and make a purchase on their website, I receive a little commission, which helps to keep up this website and gives me the opportunity to write more amazing posts for you.


13 Comments

  1. i am so glad you have carried on with your site and chosen to write a fiction series – I remember early on you were not sure about doing that – and great advice about not beating yourself up regarding missing a day or two of posting
    Did u have another blog b this one?
    x

    1. Thanks, May.

      I had a personal blog in around 2005, and I actually also tried to blog on Lizblackx.nl before I started my current blog. Those posts were so personal that I deleted them all. Yes, I know, once published it’s near impossible to erase, but I think I managed πŸ˜…

      Lizblackx
  2. I am glad you have continued with blogging, and are still continuing. I am one of those who love your bimbofication story, and look forward to each new part. Good advice here for people who are thinking about starting to blog, or who are new and wonder whether they should continue πŸ™‚

    Rebel xox

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  4. Congrats on your upcoming anniversary. I’m thrilled that you are still blogging and ventured out into a few other things and my apologizes for not paying attention to your work sooner. Last year I was not in a good place mentality but mostly physically. I really wanted to quit all of this…until May talked me into staying. Love her to bits. And had one of us quit neither would be where we are today. I appreciate your participation & support of SB4MH.
    Thanks for sharing & linking up. πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you ☺️

      May is indeed very good in convincing people to write, and I mean that in the best sense of the phrase 😁

      I think all of us feel tired of our blogs at some point, but luckily, there’s usually someone in the community to pick us back up and convince us to get back in our seats. None of us have chosen the easy route, ever, I think, so it sort of comes with this job. Thankfully it’s very rewarding πŸ˜„

      Lizblackx

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